Sunday, February 22, 2009

What a retarded storm. What a stupid headache. What a miserable day. What a pathetic sob story.

Gosh. Goshdarn. Goshdarnnit. Gjfrosiejrflksaje;lkj

I really don't want to start my chem paper. But I have to. Because I chose this class. I am so stupid. Why didn't I just drop like a normal lazy person?

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

I am neurotic. Gadi was right. Cuz a few hours ago I was ranting. I was mad, and frustrated. Now I feel helpless. Tongue-tied. Two conversations. Very different topics. All I can say is "Yeah" To both of them. But seriously, what CAN I say? I don't know. So much hopelessness and despair.
Ugh. Kill me. Can't I do my stupid lab without any mishaps for one day? It's not like I'm doing something dangerous here. My head hurts. I'm cold. I can still smell those sparklers and the acetone and the bunsen burner and the oil and the melted rubber. It's destroying my nostrils. WHY!?

Carrie Yang wrote a rant on facebook. It's very interesting, and I'm completely guilty of it.

ok srsly? rant rant rant.

Yesterday at 11:18pm
everyone i talked to is like im going to take 5/6 APsits like this year how everyone was like im going to take ap chemeveryones still going to do it. but u know ur killing urselves.that being said im prolly going to do the same :[and u guys srsly wonder y other people do drugs and shit evn though they know that they r just wasting their lives away? well now u know.and dont say: well at least we r ensuring our future/im azn i have to/everyone else is how else can i keep up?the screwed up people r like: at least we are having fun atm/im a teenager/everyone else is how else can i keep up?parallels oooOOOooo.:[ makes me wanna pack up and run off. gain life experiences or something. and if ppl r like, oh u totally threw away ur life i can be like fuck you at least i did the forrest gump where i still pwn u at life in general. nice salary, nice family, nice car, american dream whoop-de-freaking-do still doesnt beat my life experiences.this just makes me a little pissed of in general. stupid overachieving people who make me feel pressured to sign up for ridiculous classes. u guys rly suck u know that?sniff. i rly cant run away tho. and hitch-hiking=sketchyness. -.-''' im not supposed to be so stressed at such a young age.isnt this supposed to be a "rebellious" stage? i feel like we r such dream children. like wtf. i really just feel like doing something wacky and coming home and expressing my individuality/rebelliousness/teenage angst which i cant even do. last time i wanted to do something a bit risky (not evn illegal) ppl were like ehh we shouldnt be doing this. and its like ARGHHH we r still minors. we can just be like oh we srry we r stupid/ didnt see the no tresspassing sign/we're teenagers. like once everyone gets to the age where we have no more AP classes and stuff we r going to be too old to have fun this is basically my rant about how college has dominated our lives and how all these azn teens today are not evn teens but more like victims of the college parasite where all the fun and life is getting sucked out of us slowly.makes me wanna be a rebel. i can legally drive a motorcycle. i can save up money for it. i can get my permit and take the lessons (of course with a super hot instructor) and look rly cool with it. and after all my research on it and how much a motorcycle costs and yadda yadda i realized that my backpack is too heavy (where would i put all my AP books duh) and that i cant carry my lax stuff on a bike. maybe someday i will just join a peaceful biker gang. like bikers for world peace or something. i dont think i will ever need chem or calc in a biker gang. but wat sounds like rlyrlyrly fun is an auto mechanic. u just fix up cars and more cars. its like one big scioly building event. i would love to be a little greasy monkey and just fix up cars. screw pay. it would be so much fun. maybe ill get my associates degree in it and then do it as a backup job/midlife crisis career. cuz srsly i have no idea of what i want to do in life. wats the point of taking all these APs if im just going to join a biker gang or fix cars all day? NADA. i dont evn need serious college. and srsly ive been doing so much science and i dont evn like it that much. its okay but i srsly dont care about molecular reactions and their forces and stuff. im more of a legos person. and a power tools person. sometimes when im pipetting my .5 uL crap (which is literally a third of a drop of water about) i just feel like hammering all my tubes into the counter.screw this im speeding off in my motorcycle tonight.
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Shayna Yong at 11:46pm February 10
you need cooler friends ^_^just kiddingREBEL, CARRIE!come to sdsu with meand take two free periods next year

Shayna Yong at 11:47pm February 10
it's ok if you don't take 5-6 apsbut you should improve your grammar just a tad ;)

Carrie Yang at 11:55pm February 10
sdsu is too close to home. cant rebel if my mom is always going to pop in and say heyyyyand i grammar -.-'''

Robert Johnson at 12:25am February 11
kawasaki ninja is the way to go.I don't like harleys.they're big, loud, slow, and look painful.

Carrie Yang at 12:26am February 11
fine. maybe more like a moped gang. the electric ones since we r so globally conscious

Deanna Poof at 6:51am February 11
Maybe colleges drugged us when we were kids so that we obsessively take APs until we either are good enough to get into college or we die..
Andrew Fan at 12:57pm February 11
hahaha...nice...we love u carrie :)come to youth group sometime...our mindless activities will take ur mind off of is stoopid...dont worry about it :)

Mindy Duong at 3:51pm February 11
I've been pretty pissed about the same thing, especially to people who are like coming up to me and boasting about it. But I've realized, who cares? Their decisions can't affect you, not without your consent. Let them do what they want. Let them have no lives and complain about their AP classes. (Why are people like that? They sign up for a hard class, brag abou it and shove it in your face like they're so awesome, and then when they're taking the class they complain about what a hard class it is.) You get to smirk and be happy cause you're doing what YOU want, your way. Be happy with what you're doing.Um. yeah.

Mindy Duong at 3:52pm February 11
And OMG I was totally thinking about a motorcycle too :] Ever since Drake got a license for his haha.

I think it's too late to stop. If I stop now then people will say, "I told you so, you can't handle all those hard classes. You're not good enough."
Too freaking bad. I can handle them.
But if I can't do this? Pretty soon this is all gonna fall on me. Too much stress. And I might be screwed up. Too bad. I don't care anymore.

Friday, February 6, 2009

I really don't post much here, do I? I just don't know what to write...I should work on this blog more...but I don't have much time...and I don't want to post stuff for the world to see...